At the core, I think that everything that is a habit and a way of life is unromantic. โžฐ ๊ทผ๋ณธ์ ์œผ๋กœ, ์ €๋Š” ์Šต๊ด€์ด๋ฉฐ ์กด์žฌ์˜ ๋ฐฉ์‹์ธ ๋ชจ๋“  ๊ฒƒ์ด ๋น„๋กœ๋งจํ‹ฑํ•˜๋‹ค๊ณ  ์ƒ๊ฐํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
Itโ€™s like this. Even if you love someone, and even if it was love at first sight involving an incredibly dramatic maelstrom of destiny, if your heart were to keep hammering for years, or decades, just like that moment when you first metโ€ฆ โ€ฆthen youโ€™d die. โžฐ ์ด๋Ÿฐ ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋ˆ„๊ตฐ๊ฐ€๋ฅผ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜๋”๋ผ๋„, ๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์–ด๋งˆ์–ด๋งˆํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋“œ๋ผ๋งˆํ‹ฑํ•œ ์šด๋ช…์˜ ์†Œ์šฉ๋Œ์ด ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์— ์ฒซ๋ˆˆ์— ๋ฐ˜ํ–ˆ๋”๋ผ๋„, ์ฒ˜์Œ ๋งŒ๋‚œ ๊ทธ ์ˆœ๊ฐ„์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ์‹ฌ์žฅ์ด ๋ฏธ์นœ ๋“ฏ์ด ๋‘๊ทผ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ํ˜„์ƒ์ด ์ˆ˜ ๋…„, ์ˆ˜์‹ญ ๋…„ ๊ณ„์†๋˜๋ฉดโ€ฆ โ€ฆ์ฃฝ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
Yes. If that crazy emotional maelstrom state were to persist, it wouldnโ€™t be romance anymore. It would be a threat to your health, something closer to horror. A Grotesque Crazy Love Story, in which getting closer to the being that makes you feel alive also kills you at the same time. โžฐ ๋„ค. ๋งŒ์•ฝ ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ๋ฏธ์นœ ๊ฐ์ •์˜ ์†Œ์šฉ๋Œ์ด ์ƒํƒœ๊ฐ€ ๊ณ„์†๋œ๋‹ค๋ฉด, ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ ๋กœ๋งจ์Šค๊ฐ€ ์•„๋‹Œ ๊ฑด๊ฐ•์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ์œ„ํ˜‘, ์ฆ‰ ํ˜ธ๋Ÿฌ์— ๊ฐ€๊นŒ์šด ๋ฌด์–ธ๊ฐ€๊ฐ€ ๋˜๊ณ  ๋ง™๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋‚ด ์‹ฌ์žฅ์„ ๋›ฐ๊ฒŒ ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ทธ ์กด์žฌ๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€๊นŒ์ดํ•˜๋ฉด ๊ฐ€๊นŒ์ดํ• ์ˆ˜๋ก ์ฃฝ์Œ์—๋„ ๊ฐ€๊นŒ์›Œ์ง€๋Š”, ๊ทธ๋กœํ…Œ์Šคํฌํ•œ ํฌ๋ค ์ด์ง€ ๋Ÿฌ๋ธŒ ์Šคํ† ๋ฆฌ.
That is why in matters of love, there is a beginning and a middle. Thereโ€™s probably an end, too; only, thereโ€™s no way of knowing what it is, until the day you die. Thatโ€™s why the middle is so long. โžฐ ๊ทธ๋ž˜์„œ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๋“ค์—๋Š” ์ฒ˜์Œ์ด ์žˆ๊ณ  ์ค‘๊ฐ„์ด ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์•„๋งˆ ์–ธ์  ๊ฐ€๋Š” ๋๋„ ์žˆ์„ ํ…๋ฐ, ๊ทธ๊ฒŒ ๋ฌด์—‡์ธ์ง€๋Š” ์ฃฝ๊ธฐ ์ „์—๋Š” ์•Œ ๊ธธ์ด ์—†์œผ๋‹ˆ, ์ค‘๊ฐ„์ด ์ฐธ ๊น๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
It is the Middle of Repetition. There, those who love each other maintain a somewhat practical relationship: doing the laundry, going through the hectic ritual of getting-ready-for-work, and preparing for retirementโ€”together. โžฐ ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ์€ โ€˜๋ฐ˜๋ณต์˜ ์ค‘๊ฐ„โ€™์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ฑฐ๊ธฐ์„œ ์„œ๋กœ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜๋Š” ์ž๋“ค์€ ์–ด๋Š ์ •๋„ ์‹ค์šฉ์ ์ธ ๊ด€๊ณ„๋ฅผ ์œ ์ง€ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ํ•จ๊ป˜ ๋นจ๋ž˜๋ฅผ ํ•˜๊ณ , ํ—๋ ˆ๋ฒŒ๋–ก ์ถœ๊ทผ ์ค€๋น„๋ฅผ ํ•˜๊ณ , ๋…ธํ›„๋ฅผ ์ค€๋น„ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฑฐ์ฃ .
And so it is with me and my love. We keep things practical. There is absolutely no brooding. It isnโ€™t interested in the past or the future, so when we agreed to meet today, we will probably meet today, for real. And It never plays coy. Neither do I. โžฐ ์ €์™€ ์ œ ์‚ฌ๋ž‘๋„ ๊ทธ๋ ‡์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์‹ค์šฉ์ ์ธ ์‚ฌ์ด์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ณ ๋‡Œ ๋”ฐ์œ„๋Š” ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. โ€˜๊ทธ๊ฒƒโ€™์€ ์ œ ๊ณผ๊ฑฐ์™€ ๋ฏธ๋ž˜์— ๊ด€์‹ฌ์ด ์—†์–ด์„œ, ์˜ค๋Š˜ ๋งŒ๋‚˜๊ธฐ๋กœ ํ–ˆ์œผ๋ฉด ์›ฌ๋งŒํ•˜๋ฉด ์ง„์งœ๋กœ ์˜ค๋Š˜ ๋งŒ๋‚ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. โ€˜๊ทธ๊ฒƒโ€™์€ ๋ฐ€๋‹น๋„ ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ €๋„ ์•ˆ ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
We simply have an agreed-upon time at which we meet. It, as well as I, show up at the agreed-upon location, a.k.a. the keyboard. We diligently create a beginning. We even reach an end, almost as frequently as we created a beginning. And we also take the journey through the imagined middles, together. โžฐ ๊ทธ๋ƒฅ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๋งŒ๋‚˜๊ธฐ๋กœ ํ•œ ์‹œ๊ฐ„์ด ์žˆ๊ณ , โ€˜๊ทธ๊ฒƒโ€™๋„, ์ €๋„, ์•ฝ์† ์žฅ์†Œ์— (=ํ‚ค๋ณด๋“œ์—) ๋‚˜์˜ต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์—ด์‹ฌํžˆ ์ฒ˜์Œ์„ ๋งŒ๋“ญ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์‹ฌ์ง€์–ด ๋์— ๋„๋‹ฌํ•˜๊ธฐ๋„ ํ•˜๋Š”๋ฐ, ๊ทธ ๋นˆ๋„์ˆ˜๊ฐ€ ์ฒ˜์Œ์„ ๋งŒ๋“  ํšŸ์ˆ˜์™€ ๋น„์Šทํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์ฒ˜์Œ๊ณผ ๋์„ ์—ฐ๊ฒฐํ•˜๋Š” ์ƒ์ƒ ์† ์ค‘๊ฐ„๋“ค์„ ํ•จ๊ป˜ ์—ฌํ–‰ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
Weโ€™ve been doing this for ten years. The day I suddenly decided โ€œIโ€™m gonna tell storiesโ€ and started hanging out with It was April 4th, 2012. This year marks our 10-year anniversary. โžฐ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๋Š” ์ด ์ผ์„ 10๋…„ ๋™์•ˆ ํ•ด์™”์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ œ๊ฐ€ ์–ด๋Š ๋‚  ๊ฐ‘์ž๊ธฐ '๋‚˜๋Š” ์ด์•ผ๊ธฐ๋ฅผ ํ•ด์•ผ์ง€โ€™๋ผ๊ณ  ๊ฒฐ์‹ฌํ•˜๊ณ  '๊ทธ๊ฒƒ'๊ณผ ์–ด์šธ๋ฆฌ๊ธฐ ์‹œ์ž‘ํ•œ ๊ฒƒ์ด 2012๋…„ 4์›” 4์ผ์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์˜ฌํ•ด๊ฐ€ 10์ฃผ๋…„์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
Over the past ten years, Iโ€™ve moved, been in human relationships, and changed jobs. Through all those changes, It has been the only constant. โžฐ ์ง€๋‚œ 10๋…„๊ฐ„, ์ €๋Š” ์ด์‚ฌ๋„ ํ•˜๊ณ , ์ธ๊ฐ„๋“ค๊ณผ ์–ฝํ˜”๊ณ , ์ง์žฅ์„ ์˜ฎ๊ฒผ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ ๋ชจ๋“  ๋ณ€ํ™” ์†์—์„œ ์œ ์ผํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋ณ€ํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ โ€˜๊ทธ๊ฒƒโ€™์ด์—ˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
I do not doubt anymore if we will stay together. I do not wonder if this relationship is a phase that I will outgrow. As practicality replaced romance and certainty replaced the flutters, the situation became predictable. It is over-the-top obvious that I won't be able to live without It. โžฐ ์ €๋Š” ์ด์ œ ๋”๋Š” โ€˜๊ณผ์—ฐ ์šฐ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ๊ณ„์† ํ•จ๊ป˜ํ• ๊นŒโ€™ ์˜์‹ฌํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ด ๊ด€๊ณ„๊ฐ€ ๊ทธ์ € ์‹œ๊ฐ„์ด ์ง€๋‚˜๊ฐ์— ๋”ฐ๋ผ ์‹œ๋“คํ•ด์งˆ ํ•œ ์ฒ  ๊ด€์‹ฌ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ์ธ์ง€ ๊ถ๊ธˆํ•ดํ•˜์ง€๋„ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์‹ค์šฉ์„ฑ์ด ๋กœ๋งจ์Šค๋ฅผ ๋Œ€์ฒดํ•œ ๋งŒํผ, ํ™•์‹คํ•จ์ด ๋‘๊ทผ๊ฑฐ๋ฆผ์„ ๋Œ€์ฒดํ•œ ๋งŒํผ, ์ƒํ™ฉ์ด ์˜ˆ์ธก ๊ฐ€๋Šฅํ•ด์กŒ๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋”๋Š” โ€˜์ด๊ฒƒโ€™ ์—†์ด ์‚ด ์ˆ˜ ์—†๋‹ค๋Š” ๊ฒŒ ๋ถˆ ๋ณด๋“ฏ ๋ป”ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
Isnโ€™t this just about the most unromantic as things can get? To realize that a relationship isnโ€™t about choice anymore? โžฐ ์ด๊ฑฐ์•ผ๋ง๋กœ ๋น„๋กœ๋งจํ‹ฑํ•˜์ง€ ์•Š์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ? ๊ด€๊ณ„๊ฐ€ ๋”๋Š” ์„ ํƒ์— ์˜ํ•œ ๊ฒŒ ์•„๋‹ˆ๋ผ๋Š” ์ ์ด์š”?
But ah, I donโ€™t feel the urge to change a single thing. In this world, there are many shiny, exciting things. But there are also some rare things that arenโ€™t shiny and exciting anymore, which you nevertheless hold dear. Theyโ€™re such habitual ways of life, you cannot imagine your existence without them. So, romantic or otherwise, who cares? โžฐ ๊ทธ๋ ‡์ง€๋งŒ, ๋ญ ํ•˜๋‚˜ ๋ฐ”๊พธ๊ณ  ์‹ถ์€ ๋งˆ์Œ์ด ์—†์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์„ธ์ƒ์—๋Š” ๋‘๊ทผ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์„ค๋ ˆ๋Š” ์ƒˆ๋กœ์šด ๊ฒƒ์ด ๋งŽ์ง€๋งŒ, ๋”๋Š” ๋ณ„๋กœ ์•ˆ ๋‘๊ทผ๊ฑฐ๋ฆฌ๊ณ  ์•ˆ ์„ค๋ ˆ๋Š”๋ฐ๋„ ๋ˆˆ๋ฌผ๊ฒน๊ฒŒ ์ข‹์€, ๊ทธ๋Ÿฐ ํฌ๊ท€ํ•œ ๊ฒƒ๋„ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ์Šต๊ด€์ ์ธ ์กด์žฌ์˜ ๋ฐฉ์‹์ด๋ผ์„œ, ๊ทธ๊ฒƒ ์—†์ด ์กด์žฌํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฑด ์ƒ์ƒ๋„ ๋ชป ํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋˜๋Š” ๊ฒ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๊ทธ๋Ÿฌ๋‹ˆ ๋กœ๋งจํ‹ฑํ•˜๋“  ์•ˆ ํ•˜๋“ , ๋ญฃ์ด ์ค‘ํ•˜๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๊นŒ?
โ€œFor ten years, you and Iโ€™ve been through a lot. Thereโ€™s no way you will forsake me now, and I am equally unable to do it to you. I will continue to go through a lot of things in the next ten years, but I will always show up at the agreed-upon meeting place, the keyboard. You are the center of my existence.โ€ โžฐ โ€œ10๋…„ ๋™์•ˆ ๊ทธ ๋งŽ์€ ์‚ฌ๊ฑด์„ ํ•จ๊ป˜ ๊ฑฐ์ณค์œผ๋‹ˆ, ์ง€๊ธˆ์— ์™€์„œ ๋„ค๊ฐ€ ๋‚˜๋ฅผ ์ €๋ฒ„๋ฆด ๋ฆฌ๊ฐ€ ์—†๊ณ , ๋‚˜๋„ ๋„ˆ๋ฅผ ์ €๋ฒ„๋ฆด ์ˆ˜๊ฐ€ ์—†๋‹ค. ๋‚˜๋Š” ๋˜ 10๋…„ ๋™์•ˆ ์ˆ˜๋งŽ์€ ์ผ์„ ๊ฒช๊ฒ ์ง€๋งŒ, ์ง€๊ธˆ๊นŒ์ง€์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ์•ฝ์† ์žฅ์†Œ์ธ ํ‚ค๋ณด๋“œ๋กœ ๋‚˜์˜ค๊ฒ ๋‹ค. ๋„ˆ๋Š” ๋‚ด ์กด์žฌ์˜ ์ค‘์‹ฌ์ด๋‹ค.โ€
Is this unromantic? Romantic? Yeahโ€ฆ It is what it is. Thank you for being witness to our unromantic romance, our romantic unromance. We shall keep on being in love. โžฐ ๋น„๋กœ๋งจํ‹ฑํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ? ๋กœ๋งจํ‹ฑํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๊นŒ? ๋„ค์—โ€ฆ ๊ทธ๋ ‡์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์šฐ๋ฆฌ์˜ ๋น„๋กœ๋งจํ‹ฑํ•œ ๋กœ๋งจ์Šค, ๋กœ๋งจํ‹ฑํ•œ ๋น„๋กœ๋งจ์Šค์— ์ฆ์ธ์ด ๋˜์–ด ์ฃผ์…”์„œ ๊ฐ์‚ฌํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์•ž์œผ๋กœ๋„ ๊ณ„์† ์‚ฌ๋ž‘ํ•˜๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

Vault Updates

In Pure Fiction, Silver Lining has been uploaded. Also, <Map of Random> - eye, exploration, morsel and <Map of Random> - obstacle, sculpture, assessment.๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธ


Vault ์—…๋ฐ์ดํŠธ

Bye!
๐Ÿ’Œ That's it for today. Hit reply to say hello! โžฐ ์˜ค๋Š˜์€ ์ด๊ฒŒ ๋‹ค์˜ˆ์š”. ๊ทธ๋ƒฅ ํ•œ๋ฒˆ ๋ง ๊ฑธ์–ด๋ณด๊ณ  ์‹ถ๋‹ค๋ฉด ์ด ์ด๋ฉ”์ผ์— ๋‹ต์žฅํ•˜์‹œ๋ฉด ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๐Ÿ˜„